Black Hole
by ChoCedric
Summary: As Sirius sits chained to a chair at the Ministry of Magic, waiting to be sent to Azkaban, he feels nothing but despair. He feels as empty as a black hole, for in his heart he knows he's to blame for the deaths of his dearest friends.


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

Black Hole

By: ChoCedric

"ENERVATE!"

Sirius Black awoke with a start. For a moment, his mind was completely blank, and he didn't know where he was at all. It took him a few seconds to realize that he couldn't move at all, for he was tied to a chair. But as he looked around, a feeling of despair and horror seized him as all the vivid memories came rushing back.

For he, Sirius Black, was tied to a chair at the Ministry of Magic. The last thing he could remember was standing over Peter's torn, bloody robes and his finger in the street, laughing maniacally as he saw his ex-friend disappear into the sewers in his rat form. Then countless Ministry Aurors had appeared, and it had been his old comrade from the Order, Kingsley Shacklebolt, who had effectively stunned him.

And now, he was here. Utter hysteria took a hold of him, the same madness which had blinded him in the street. A low chuckle came from deep within his belly, and within seconds, it turned into more hysterical laughter. He had killed Lily and James Potter, handed them on a silver platter to Voldemort, but by God, he hadn't meant to! It had been Peter, all Peter! The last thing he'd ever do was betray his friends, but now, the whole world was going to think he was just like the rest of his sociopath family.

"You're sick, Black. Stop laughing, you bastard." A tall, muscular man stood over him, and Sirius felt even madder as he realized it was Benjamin Williamson, an Auror he had formerly worked with. Williamson was not a member of the Order, but since Sirius had been an Auror as well, they had gone on missions together.

"You're disgusting, Black," Williamson sneered. "How could you do it? You killed the Potters! Harry was just a baby, you son of a bitch. How could you want your precious master to kill a baby? STOP LAUGHING, YOU MADMAN!"

"Calm down, Williamson." Another voice spoke, and Sirius realized through his hysterics that it was Shacklebolt. He walked into the room, and following him was a dementor.

And at this, every attempt of Sirius to think clearly failed. As the dementor entered the room, all of Sirius's bad memories swam to the surface, causing him to laugh even harder. His mother, telling him he was less than a human being; his father, telling him at sixteen that if he walked out of the house he could never return; Regulus, giving him an evil smile and telling him that he'd always be his parents' favorite son. Then he saw Peter, and it made him sick to his stomach. Every memory of Peter was tainted now, even the memories of the small, plump boy who'd so shyly introduced himself on the Hogwarts Express, the boy who'd lavished so much praise and affection on the other Marauders. That boy had vowed to be their friend forever, and he'd gone and betrayed them all. Sirius's laughter grew into a cackle that made the hairs on every sane person's neck stand on end.

"You are going to answer some questions, Black," Kingsley Shacklebolt boomed, the most grotesque look of anger on his face. "No doubt, you will be going straight to Azkaban."

"Too right, too right," said another man, Barty Crouch, Sr., as he walked into the room. "You disgust me, Black. I should have known you'd be just like the rest of your family. It's in the genes, you know," he said to Williamson. "They're all insane, the Blacks. Every last one of them."

"Will you STOP THAT DAMN LAUGHING FOR JUST ONE SECOND WHILE WE FORCE THIS DOWN YOUR THROAT!" Shacklebolt snarled, but Sirius did not listen as more bitter memories consumed him and bile forced its way up his stomach and into his throat.

"Let's get this traitor off to Azkaban," Crouch hissed venomously as he forcefully pried Sirius's mouth open with his wand. He then dropped three drips of Veritaserum onto Sirius's tongue.

Sirius's face went blank, and a huge argument was warring within him. One side of his mind was hoping that somehow, Crouch would ask questions that Sirius could answer honestly, telling the law enforcement official that he was not to blame for today's events, that it had been Peter. But the other side of him was saying, you deserve this, Black. You deserve all the punishment you'll get, for you did kill the Potters. You know you did. You weren't their secret keeper, but you killed them. Just admit it.

"BLACK!" Shacklebolt roared. "DID YOU KILL LILY AND JAMES POTTER?"

Sirius let out another cackle, and he couldn't help but say the answer which his heart felt was right. "Yes," he said, a note of insanity in his voice. "I killed them, I killed them, I killed them!"

A look of smug satisfaction crossed Crouch's face. "So all these events of the past few days were your fault?" he asked contemptuously.

"Yes, yes, yes," Sirius laughed wildly. "My fault, my fault, all my fault, Lily and James, I killed them, I killed them, I killed them!"

"Right," said Crouch, smirking nastily. "That's all we needed to know. LEAD HIM AWAY!" he snarled at the dementor in the room.

Sirius felt himself being untied from the chair as the dementor touched him with its cold, clammy hands. Before he knew it, Sirius was being led out of the room, laughing all the while. Crouch followed, still looking wholly superior.

"I hope you rot in hell," Williamson growled as he stared at Sirius, not a hint of compassion or forgiveness in his eyes. "You belong with the worst kind of scum. Lily, James, and Peter all loved you. I hope the dementors suck you dry, slowly."

Sirius continued to laugh as the dementor and Crouch led him out of the Ministry. Before long, he felt the sensation of apparition as Crouch held his arm in a viselike grip. Images and scenes from his life swam past him as he landed in a place where he could smell the salt of the sea and hear waves lapping.

"What would Adelina think of you now, Black? She'd be sickened by what you've become," Crouch snarled, glaring at his prisoner. "Did you forget that your master's most faithful servant killed her?"

Pain engulfed Sirius's heart as Adelina's name was mentioned. She was a girl that Sirius had loved back in his Hogwarts days. She had died in their sixth year, when Hogsmeade was attacked, at Bellatrix Lestrange's hand. She had died at St. Mungo's, when the Healers could do nothing for her condition. She had slipped into the afterlife in Sirius's arms. She had confided to him that her worst fear was to die alone, so it had seemed appropriate that she had died in the company of the boy who'd captured her heart.

Crouch's right, he thought as he was pulled viciously into a tiny boat. She'd be disgusted by me now. I can't even stop laughing. But as hard as he tried, he couldn't stop feeling the sheer madness that rose within him. This whole situation was insane. Peter had totally taken advantage of the fact that Sirius would never betray James and Lily. Peter had totally taken advantage of the fact that people would immediately throw him in Azkaban, assuming he was just like the rest of his family. Peter had totally taken advantage of the fact that people would never, ever give him the benefit of the doubt, just because he was a Black.

As the boat sailed toward Azkaban, more pictures and images swarmed through Sirius's mind: James's lifeless hazel eyes staring, staring, staring up at the night sky, Lily, her green eyes empty but full of pleading, little Harry in Hagrid's arms, gazing at Sirius with such a look of trust that it caused him complete agony. I did that to them, he thought to himself. I made James and Lily's eyes lifeless and empty like that. Oh Gods, they'll never forgive me. And Remus...'oh, Gods, Remus. He'll hate me now.

The boat then landed on the dock of Azkaban, and as Sirius was led inside, the stench of decay, despair, and hopelessness washed over him. He was viciously led down many corridors, and he vaguely wondered, through his ongoing haze of insanity, where his cell would be located.

He found this out all too soon as he was led to the high-security part of the prison. As Crouch unlocked a cell door and the dementor pushed him roughly inside, Crouch hissed, "Burn in hell, Black. You are scum. Filth. The worst kind of turncoat. May you never see the light of day again."

And as the cell door slammed and Crouch and the dementor walked away, Sirius Black finally stopped laughing. And all at once, he began to weep.


End file.
